Retard-est

Sometimes it's not only the students who make me feel like banging my head against a wall, but also some of the teachers. One of my classmates from IBA, Muneeb-ur-Rehman recently joined AH to teach IELTS. The other day, it was raining heavily and so none of his students turned up. Instead of going home, Muneeb whined about having to cancell class- whined to the reception walay,  to Sir Irfan, and to everyone in the vicinity- and occupied a chair. I just rolled my eyes and thought dude, go home!

An African guy and his sister were sitting in the reception when I ducked out of class to get some handouts. Apparently no one at the reception could understand a word of what he was saying- he didn't seem to know any Urdu- so Sir Irfan was called for.

The African guy mumbled something and Sir reiterated 'What? You want to sell us books?'

'No! I give books,' he repeated adamantly. 'For Computer Studies.'

After ten minutes, Sir finally figured out that he was not a salesman. 'Do you want to study here?' he asked, slowly enunciating each word.

'Me not study, my sister,' he pointed to the hijabi girl sitting on his right. 'Maths.'

Sir sighed. 'That will be a problem for us, because there will be a communication gap,' he motioned between the two of them, saying 'communication' as if he was breaking up a word for a child.

'Why? You teach,' insisted the African guy. Tch tch. Poor Sir.

Sir held up his hands. 'Sorry, I don't teach.' Haha. Yeah right, Sir.

'What has she done so far?' Sir questioned, but was unable to be understood.

Muneeb-ur-Rehman, who couldn't stand staying out of the conversation any longer, got up and plopped into the chair next to African Guy and his sister. 'What has she studied so far?'

African Guy managed to convey that she had completed high school back at home, and wanted to apply for Computer Studies at Sindh University. (Yes, everyday I get to know about universities I never knew existed). That took another ten minutes.

'Ok, you bring your books, I'll teach. Come on Friday, I have class from 7-9,' volunteered Muneeb-ur-Rehman. It turned out that the books were for prep and not for Computer Studies.

Sir Irfan chuckled. 'Arey, tum parhao gaey kya ussay?' (Will you teach him)

Muneeb-ur-Rehman shrugged. 'Sure. Bring your books, we'll see.'

Apparently, he had agreed to teach the girl Math, when he's a teacher for English. During a time slot when he would be conducting an IELTS class. I guess the African guy really took a warming to Muneeb-ur-Rehman, because he asked me to call him from Sir Irfan's office a couple of minutes later.

'Please call, the guy,' he requested, as if Muneeb-ur-Rehman was THE GUY. When he came out from the office, he asked him to repeat everything he had just been told for the past half hour. Haha.